So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
I'm sober. Being kissed by a chick with a llama puppet. Shoot me now.
You got her pregnant one week before your vasectomy? You couldn't wait one week to cheat on me?
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
I DONT HAVE A FUCKING JOB RIGHT NOW. DO YOU THINK I HAVE TIME TO WASTE GOING BACK AND FORTH WITH SOMEONE WHOS LYING, ABOUT LYING, AND JUST BEING A LIAR? HONESTLY, YES I DO HAVE TIME. BUT I HAVE A FUCKING LOT BETTER THINGS I COULD BE WASTING MY TIME DOING. LIKE ORGANIZING MY POKEMON CARD COLLECTION.
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
Randomize
