Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
Randomize