Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
Accidentally typed message to mom that included word "kink." FML. Played it off as autocorrect from "drink" which was somehow more acceptable
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
Randomize
