this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
Just drunk tweeted NASA asking them to give me a lift home in one of their spaceships. Fingers crossed
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
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