but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
Randomize
