How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
Roman Polanski is more welcome at my daughter's birthday party than you are at that bar
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
Randomize
