Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
That's just a really flattering way of saying, "Yes, you're useless, but you have great tits."
All of my Tinder matches have neck tattoos. It's like God wants me to go to jail again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize