K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
she was so wasted that she tried to tuck me in and read the jokes on the taco bell sauce as a bed time story
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
When you called me you were telling a hobo that you couldn't spare ten bucks bc that was your beer money. All your words were slurred.
Fuck him.
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
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