I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
Yo dont text me then not text me
i may or may not be watching the land before time
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
I've never used poorer judgment in my life. It's mathematically possible that I impregnated 5 women in the past 24 hours since I won the lottery. But I couldn't be happier about it.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
Shame is for Republicans.
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