then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
Way to fucking accidentally drunk dial me while you're talking to and buying other girls drinks. Don't call me.
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
Randomize
