wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
I am naked and annoyed.
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
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