when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!