ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
Walked into this guys room, saw a tickle me elmo under his desk with white stains in its mouth. This is awkward.
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
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