can we get nightvision for the apartment?
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
Question #1: Why am I on my living room floor? Question #2: Where did the bloody footprints come from? Question #3: Why are there two McChickens next to the wine bottle?
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
Randomize
