Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
I booty texted him nothing but three exclamation points at 3:05am and he was in my bed 17 minutes later, lest you think punctuation is not important.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
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