She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
operation have a gay friend backfired
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
I'm gonna fight the coyote
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
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