There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
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