I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
I'm responsible for my client's overall well-being. Which is terrifying coming from someone that can't stop masturbating and eats leftover pizza just about everyday.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
Randomize
