she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
So I called her out for all the gossip she does and she's like "you do the same, bitch"
So I was like "Im classy like the Countess, youre just a bitch like Kim."
Kudos on the Interstate Housewife metaphor.
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
My bed is full of blood and feathers
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
Randomize