Ambien. No doubt about it.
I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
Randomize
