So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
Randomize