whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
Randomize