i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
I'm too drunk to be surrounded by this many indians
How do you manage to be drunk and a racial minority so often?
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
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Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
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I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.