my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
Like, what's the customary waiting period to hookup with your newly single ex that you never stopped hooking up with?
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
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