I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
I told him "thank you for wearing a turtleneck yesterday, I no longer have a strong erg to have sex with you. " He is no longer speaking to me.
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
Sorry I missed your call. I was in the shower washing away my sins and sweat. Please tell me you want to get drunk as shit later.
Randomize
