I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
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