you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
No more Irish car bombs ever.
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
Also, beer. Big fan.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
You need to be on (or possibly create) the international emoji committee to address all of these glaring oversights
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
Randomize
