they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
You know the guy who poops at a party and then leaves and you go in, do your business, and come out and there are girls outside that think you pooped and no one talks to you? I'm the guy who poops before you go in, because I'm in a relationship and I hate you.
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
My ex came to my place while I was gone. Random things he took: snow shoes, my laundry quarters, a decorative picture, all my condiments, the container that held my rice and a sticker off my wallet. Then left a note saying he watered my plants and fed my cats. What. The. Fuck.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Randomize
