i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
I woke up to an email from Groupon for 3 laser lipo treatments...on Valentine's Day...way to kick me when I'm down Groupon.
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
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