My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
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