So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
I take back everything I said about communal showers
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
We need to stop calling him that. I definitely said “Fuck me harder Swizzle Dick“ while we were doing it and it got weird
He should appreciate that I recommend that corkscrew cock of his! I’m getting him laid
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