You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
I need to sanitize my soul.
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
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