My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
It's not a walk of shame if you run
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
Randomize
