OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
Randomize
