white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
I told the cop to try walking in heels and he'd understand why I was walking home without then on. He told me he only does that on Wednesdays.
whoa! who said he's my boyfriend?
Oops. Sorry. That guy you keep accidentally running into in public. And at home. And with your vagina.
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
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