A little girl and i are having a face making battle in mcdonalds
She started it, but I totally finished it.
I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
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