normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
My underwear smells like fireworks.
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
Randomize
