we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
i think my mom watched the whole time
I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
I distinctly remember calling the anesthesiologist a "sneaky little bastard" directly to his face
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
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