Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
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Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
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We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
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