Why did I wake up with "How to masturbate" on my youtube search bar?
You told us you forgot how, and started to cry.
operation harelip BJ is a go
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
Randomize
