I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
Randomize
