Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
Randomize
