So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
I just found out my birth date is Pick Your Poison Day. Goodbye, conscience, forever. I was born to live like this.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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