I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
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