My cat gives me a boner
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
Randomize
