I murdered the dance floor call the cops
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
I can't believe this. 100 bucks says my Botox lasts longer than their marriage will.
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
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