i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
Randomize