im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
sorry i got drunk at sunday brunch and force fed carrot sticks to your cat
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize