I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
Speeding home on my break at work because I forgot to grab my Percocets that I have because getting through work sober's too hard
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
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