this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
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She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
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If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.