Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
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