weddingsv make me drug and hornr
Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
The cop didn't care that I was peeing on the wall of my dorm building... All he said was, "come on, it's 9am."
I just went in my fridge and said to my turkey "see you thursday". I seriously have issues
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
I have feelings that need drinking.
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
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